English will be the official language of the European Union

The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility. As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5- year phase-in plan that would become known as "Euro-English".   In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c".. Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.   There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f".. This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter.   In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.   Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling.   Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away.   By the 4th yer people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with "z" and "w" with "v".   During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou" and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensi bl riten styl.   Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi TU understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.   Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze forst plas.   If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl.

Important Message re circulating emails. - High Importance!!!

Here is something everyone should read and act accordingly. If you don't, you're  hurting yourself and your email buddies.  Please read right to the bottom.

By now, I  suspect everyone is familiar with www.snopes.com  and/or  www..truthorfiction.com for determining  whether information received via email is just that: true/false  or fact/fiction. Both are  excellent sites. 

Advice from Snopes.com Very Important!

1) Any time you see an E-Mail that says  forward this on to '10' (or however many) of your friends, sign  this petition, or you'll get bad luck, good luck, you'll see  something funny on your screen after you send it, or whatever,  it almost always has an E-Mail tracker program attached  that tracks the cookies and E-Mails of those folks you forward  to.

The host sender  is getting a copy each time it gets  forwarded and then is able to get lists of 'active' E-Mail  addresses to use in SPAM E-Mails, or sell to other spammers.  Even when you get emails that demand you send the email on  if you're not ashamed of God/Jesus ....that's  E-mail tracking and they're playing on our conscience.  These people don't care how they get your email addresses  - just as long as they get them. Also, emails that talk  about a missing child or a child with an incurable disease  -  "how would you feel if that was  your child"....E-mail Tracking!!!

Ignore them and  don't participate! 

2) Almost all E-Mails  that ask you to add your name and forward on to others are  similar to that mass letter years ago that asked people to send  business cards to the little kid in Florida who wanted to break  the Guinness Book of Records for the most cards. All it was,  and all any of this type of E-Mail is, is a way to get names  and 'cookie' tracking information for telemarketers  and spammers - - to validate active E-Mail accounts for  their own profitable purposes. 

You can do  your friends and family members a GREAT favor by sending this  information to them; you will be providing a service to your  friends, and will be rewarded by not getting thousands of spam  E-Mails in the future! 

If you have been  sending out (FORWARDING) the above kinds of E-Mail, now you  know why you get so much SPAM! 

Do yourself a  favor and STOP adding your name(s) to those types of listings  regardless how inviting they might sound!...or make you feel  guilty if you don't!...it's all about getting email addresses  - nothing more! 

You may think you are  supporting a GREAT cause, but you are NOT! Instead, you will be  getting tons of junk mail later and very possibly a virus  attached!  Plus, you are helping the spammers get rich!  Let's not make it easy for them! 

Also: E-Mail petitions are  NOT acceptable to White House, Congress or any other  organization - i.e. social security, etc. To be acceptable, petitions must have a signed signature and full address of the  person signing the petition, so this is a waste of time and  you're just helping the Email  trackers. 

AND MOST IMPORTANT:... don't forget...

Delete other people's e-mail addresses on the e-mails you send out.

 When forwarding/sending- send all as BCC:   

  

A is Apple, B is Bluetooth, C is...

Latest from Nursery Schools:



A:  APPLE

   
 B:  BLUETOOTH
                                                 
C:  CHAT

 
  D:  DOWNLOAD

E:  E MAIL

 
 F:  FACEBOOK

G:  GOOGLE


 H:  HEWLETT PACKARD

 
 I:     iPHONE

J:  JAVA


  K:  KINGSTON


   L:   LAPTOP

M:  MESSENGER

   N:  NERO

       O:  ORKUT

P:  PICASSA

Q:  QUICK HEAL

   R:  RAM

   S:  SERVER

T:  TWITTER

  U:  USB

    V:  VISTA


W:  WiFi

X:   Xp

Y:  YOU TUBE


Z:  ZORPIA

Thank God .... A is still Apple

 

 

 

TO ALL MUMS - THIS IS GREAT

I am only a mother The officer at the Driving License counter asked the lady "What is your occupation?" The woman seeking renewal of her license seemed to be puzzled. So the officer said "Ma'am, are you employed, have your own business or................ The woman replied "Oh, yes!! I have a full time occupation. I am a mother" Officer: "We don't have 'mother' as an option for occupation.   I will write it down as 'Housewife'. That takes care of all questions." This had happened long ago, and was forgotten. Years later when I went to get my license, the Public Relations Officer was a somewhat pompous.woman. "Your occupation?" she asked in a rather authoritative tone. I just had an inspiration and replied "I am a researcher in the field of Child Development, Nutrition and Inter-personal Relationships" The lady officer stared at me in amazement. I calmly repeated my statement and she wrote it down verbatim. Then, unable to conceal her curiosity, she politely asked "What exactly do you do in your profession, Ma'am?"  I was feeling good about having described my occupation so calmly and confidently. So I replied "My research projects have been going on for a number of years (Mothers never retire!!). My research is conducted in the laboratory as well as in the field. I have two bosses. (One is God and the other is my entire family). I have received two honours in this field. (A son and a daughter) My topic is considered to be the most difficult part of sociology.(All moms will agree!!). I have to work more than 14 hours every day. Sometimes even 24 hours are not enough and the challenges are tougher than many other professions. My compensation is in terms of mental satisfaction rather than money" I could see that the officer was thoroughly impressed. After completing the licensing formalities, she came to the door to see me off. This new viewpoint about my occupation made me feel much better on my way back home. I was welcomed by my 5 year old research assistant at the door. My new project (my 6 month old baby) was energetically practicing her 'music'. I had earned a small victory over the Governmental red tape today. I was no longer 'merely a mother', instead I was now a highly placed functionary in a service vital for mankind -Motherhood!! 'Mother' - Isn't it a great title. Fit to be added to the nameplate on the door!! By this standard, grandmothers deserve to be called Senior Research Officers, and Great Grandmothers qualify as 'Research Directors'. Aunts and other ladies of that age group can be called 'Research Facilitators' Please share this with all mothers, grandmothers, great grandmothers, all ladies currently holding posts like didi-tai-chachi-mami-mausi-bua ...... They will all shower you with blessings and life will be happier.

__._,_.___

A case of kiss and a slap

A Manager, his Assistant (Male), one old woman and her young daughter are traveling in a train and during the course of time get themselves introduced to each other and become temporary friends. The train goes through a tunnel and it gets completely dark. Suddenly there is a kissing sound and then a slap!

The train comes out of the tunnel.

The women and the Assistant are sitting there looking perplexed.

The Manager is bending over holding his  face, which is red from an apparent slap. All of them remain diplomatic and nobody says anything.

The Old woman is thinking:  

These Managers are all crazy after girls. He must have kissed my daughter in the tunnel. Very proper that she slapped him.

The Young girl is thinking:

The Manager must have tried to kiss me but kissed my mother instead and got slapped.

The Manager is thinking:  

Damn it. My Assistant must have kissed the young girl. She might have thought it was me and slapped me.

The Assistant is thinking:  

If this train goes through another tunnel I will make another kissing sound and slap my Manager again.  The Rascal keeps harassing me in the Office
   

Founders of Microsoft

WHERE ARE THEY NOW? What Happened To The People In Microsoft's Iconic 1978 Company Photo

It's one of the most iconic photos in American business.

A ragtag group of bearded weirdos assembled for a family portrait in Albuquerque.
Usually, there's a question above the photo: "Would you have invested?"
It's a trick question. You're supposed to answer no – because well, look at those people – but then you learn it's a company portrait of Microsoft from 1978.
It was taken just before the then startup left Albuquerque for Seattle. (Microsoft couldn't find anyone willing to move to New Mexico.)
Early employee Bob Greenberg, pictured in the middle, won the free portrait after calling in a radio show and guessing the name of an assassinated president. The gang reluctantly gathered together in some of their finest attire, and American business legend was made.
We all know what happened with the two guys in the bottom left and bottom right corners -- Bill Gates, and Paul Allen. But what about the rest? We saw the question pop up on Hacker News recently, and decided to find out.

Bill Gates is now giving away the billions he made from Microsoft

Image: Business Insider, Microsoft

We all know what happened with this guy. Bill Gates founded and built Microsoft from nothing into the most valuable technology company in the world. Along the way he amassed a fortune, which he's now giving away to all sorts of good causes.

Andrea Lewis became a fiction writer and freelance journalist

Image: Business Insider, Microsoft

Andrea Lewis was the only person at the company that was from Albuquerque. She was a technical writer for Microsoft, which meant she wrote documents explaining Microsoft's software. She left Microsoft in 1983, eventually becoming a  freelance journalist and fiction writer. Thanks in part to her Microsoft options, her net worth was estimated at $2 million by the AP.

Maria Wood sued Microsoft just 2 years later

Image: Business Insider, Microsoft

Maria Wood was a book keeper for Microsoft, and married to another one of the early Microsofties in the picture. She left the company just two years later, suing it for sexual discrimination. Microsoft settled the case. After that, it doesn't look like she did much else. She raised her children and became a volunteer.

Paul Allen has spent his billions on sports teams, startups, and much more

Image: Business Insider, Microsoft

After Bill Gates, Paul Allen is the most famous guy in the group. Allen, the other Microsoft cofounder, is the 37th richest person in the world according to Forbes. He's the owner of the Portland Trailblazers, the Seattle Seahawks, one of the biggest yachts in the world, and much more.

Bob O'Rear went onto be a cattle rancher

Image: Business Insider, Microsoft

Bob O'Rear was one of the oldest employees at Microsoft. He was at NASA in Mission Control when we landed on the moon. At Microsoft he was a chief mathematician, and is credited with reworking code in DOS, and getting it onto IBM PCs. He left the company in 1983, moved back to his home state of Texas, and did some cattle ranching. His worth is estimated at $100 million, and he sits on the board of a few local businesses.

Bob Greenberg left Microsoft, then worked on the Cabbage Patch Kids

Image: Business Insider, Microsoft

Bob Greenberg was the guy that won a radio call-in contest to get the photo. He left Microsoft in 1981, after helping the company develop a new version of BASIC. When he left he went on to help his family's company, Coleco, develop the Cabbage Patch Kid dolls, which became a huge hit. More recently, he's said to have worked on golf course software.

Marc McDonald left Microsoft because it was getting big, but ended up back at the company, anyway

Image: Business Insider, Microsoft

Marc McDonald was the first salaried employee, and when he left in 1984, it was because he didn't like how big the company was getting. After leaving Microsoft he went to another Paul Allen company, Asymetrix. He then went to Seattle design company Design Intelligence, which was acquired by Microsoft in 2000. So, he ended up back at Microsoft! According to the AP, he has said he is worth less than $1 million.

Gordon Letwin stayed with Microsoft longer than anyone other than Bill Gates

Image: Business Insider, Microsoft

Gordon Letwin was with the company until 1993, the second longest run of all the employees pictured (Gates is first). He was a programmer at Microsoft, and quit when he wanted a break from the grind of the company. He has a ranch in Arizona, and has donated money to some environmental causes. His worth is estimated at $20 million or so.

Steve Wood went on to found Wireless Services Corp.

Image: Business Insider, Microsoft

Steve Wood is the husband of Maria Wood, who eventually left Microsoft under bad circumstances. Steve left in 1980, but worked with Paul Allen on a few companies. He founded Wireless Services Corp., a mobile messaging company, in 1996. It's been renamed SinglePoint, and he's now the chairman. He and his wife's net worth is pegged at $15 million now.

Bob Wallace was a fan of psychedelic drugs and founded a software company after Microsoft

Image: Business Insider, Microsoft

Bob Wallace seems like he was one of the most far out early Microsoft employees. He spent time and money researching psychedelic drugs after leaving the company. He also founded a software company called Quicksoft. He died in 2002 from pneumonia.

Jim Lane went on to do his own software company

Image: Business Insider, Microsoft

Jim Lane was a project manager who left in 1985 reportedly saying, Microsoft "beat the enthusiasm out of me." He went on to start his own software company. At Microsoft he helped with the early partnership with Intel. (Something that's been pretty useful for Microsoft so far.)

Here's one more look at the gang from 1978 ...

Image: Microsoft

... And here's a photo of them from 2008 that Microsoft put together when Bill Gates was leaving the company

Image: Microsoft